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Dear Mr. Romney

Dear Mr. Romney

We citizens need to see your tax returns so we too can figure out how to starve our government. I’m impressed that you are returning us to “survival of the fittest” principles that guided our nation for the first 150 years. If we, under your leadership, can dismantle social programs in the U.S.A. in favor of building schools, hospitals and roads in the Middle East over the next several decades then I say “bravo!” I also like your idea of building up our military so we can “bomb, bomb Iran” as Sen. McCain so eloquently sings.

We, like you need to know hat tax exemptions, loopholes, etc., to use so we can use our own money for private schools, nannies, mansions, luxury cars, yachts, three-story garages, private golf courses and so much more.

Some of us don’t want to be commoners anymore. Public parks are crowded. Public schools are failing. Rusted cars and “sinking boats” abound.

My fellow commoners are lazy, dependent riff-raff that I no longer wish to help or associate with.

As a bonus, maybe we can starve social security, medicare, medicaid, public schools, our national parks, our infrastructure, our police, and fire departments, our counties, our cities and especially poor people.

I for one, want to be a part of your aristocracy, meritocracy, plutocracy or whatever. I will even be your limo driver. It must pay better than a job at WalMart.

Why are you withholding your tax returns? How can we be like you if we don’t know how you became rich and successful?

I want to separate myself from common, ordinary, ever day life, live in a gate community and hire security personnel to fend off the riff raff when they come to steal my food. Help!

Bruce G. Femling


Denton (Denny) Newman Jr.
I've worked at the Brainerd Dispatch with various duties since Dec. 7, 1983. Starting off as an Ad Designer and currently Director of Audience Development. The Dispatch has been an interesting and challenging place to work. I'm fortunate to have made many friends, both co-workers and customers.
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